Time is cray cray. I loath myself for writing that. But it’s true. It’s crazy how yesterday was just the day before and tomorrow will be here soon and right now is already gone. It’s too much for me to handle at times. I am constantly in a phobic state that I may miss something; an experience, a moment, anything… What if I miss something that I could use in something later on. What if I miss a experience that could fit perfectly into a pace of prose that would make it the most epic thing anyone has ever read, but now that I’ve missed it I’m doomed to be another storyteller screaming into the void, the despair pit, the nothingness… What if I suck st life now because I missed something yesterday or the day after I was born or anytime in between. 

   Relativity is unbelievably unascertained amoeba, it has nothing to do with anything and everything to do with everything! We could never measure anything if it weren’t for relativity. An inch is relative to a foot, and a millimetre to a meter and so on… With time relativity is everything. You hear all the time people say as you get older time goes by faster and that’s not a wise tale it’s come poetry true! Think of a three year old. If you were to tell a three year old that in just three years you will be six. (I double checked my math for this one) to that three year old three years is a long time, everything you know, the extent of your knowledge, experiences and your life itself  exist with in three years. It took you three years Now think of a sixty year old. Whom you tell in three years this will happen. They are going to think, “well heck that will be here before you know it” because you’ve experience three years twenty times in your life. Three years is nothing it’s one twentieth of everything you know! (Broke out the calculator for that one) so literally and figuratively three years goes by much faster to a sixty year old compared to a three year old, relatively speaking. Time is relative we wouldn’t be able to measure it out into units with out it. 

   Now how does this effect those with mental and emotional problems. Quite frankly in the worst of ways. For someone experiencing depression time almost stands still as you suffer. For some one experiencing anxiety and pressure time can’t go by faster as your panic burgeons exponentially to the point of an attack. 

    How do I avoid or deal with this?

I don’t know try to avoid and if you have to deal with it.  That is the absolute worst advice. Yep! You can’t control time. You can not manipulate it or traverse it. I know yesterday I threw an unannounced rager for time lords and other time travelers but no one showed. Today I let the world know! Time travelers are either assholes or don’t exist. know that time is out side of your control and all you can do is control what you do and how you feel about the time spent within that spand of time and redundancy. The time is yours do what makes you shoot during it. 

If you have the time and you are in Montanta City please go to  and get the Combination Plate of Gourmet Red BBO Chicken and Huckleberry Pork Ribs they’re amazing! 

4 Mt Hwy 518, Montana City, MT 59634

Thank you so much for reading I hope that you enjoyed it and possibly got something out of it. If you hated it and feel the need to express that disappointment feel free to email me at TheDepartmentOfComplaints@gmail.com . I’d like to thank and mention Hillary from New Zealand yes my complaints email is heavily inspired by JK Rowling’s Harry Potter series. If you like my writing, stand up set, or any other work feel free to let me know that as well it helps with Atelophobia. Also to answer a question I’ve gotten a lot no I don’t get endorsements or any kind of pay for plugin restaurants. 

I am not a mental health professional if you do need or even feel like you need help please reach out to (212) 673-3000 a free hotline if you need to talk. 

Love-

Noah