Words are hard

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I know you’ve heard the confusion around “Why do we drive on a parkway and park on a driveway?” But the debacling  conundrum goes even further. (Yes I know debacling isn’t a word) 

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Why do we call a situation where the out come your desire has a very slim opourinity of actually happening a fat chance?

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Why do we not have a Singular Gender-Neutral Pronoun? (Think about it) Nor do we have a plural form of the word you which is very unintelligent.

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How come we trust our financials to a broker?

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Why is it that the word hyphenated is not hyphenated but the word non-hyphenated is?

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If horrific is a form of horrible then shouldn’t terrific be one of terrible?

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Why does “overlook” mean to miss something and to “oversee” means to observe and supervise? (“How could you overlook this I told you look over it carefully! I’ll have to get someone else to oversee this now!”)

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The number 22 is pronounced twenty two but 11 is eleven. (Although onety one sounds weird)

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There are 1,025,110 words in the English language.

967 of those words contain a “I” and a “E” right next to one another.

Supposedly the language has a rule that the “I” must come before the “E” with the clause of except after “C”.

Of those 967 instances 44 of those words actually follow the rule.

So 4% of the time our language actually follows the rule.

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If some one asks if you are down with something they are actually asking if you can put up with it.

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When your alarm clock goes off you wake up and turn it off?

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How come if you take an item put it in a box and send it across the United States in a car the box called a shipment but if you take the same item and put it in the same box then send it across the ocean on a ship it’s called cargo?

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All together means everyone or everything together whilst Altogether is an adverb meaning cumulatively everything.

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Why do we call the night time when its dark after dark? Shouldn’t that be in the light the next morning?

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Why are the bleachers for spectators to sit on called stands?

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If you cook a strip of pig meat in pan it’s called Bacon, but if you bake a piece of dough in the oven it’s called a cookie. 

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Monosyllabic is a five syalable word describing words with one syalable and Hippopotomonstrosesquipedaliophobia  is the fear of long words.  No need to explain further.

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A grapenut is neither a grape nor a nut!

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When traveling a man packs his dress suits in something called a garmet bag while any one else packing actual garments pack then in a suitcase… I digress.
Send complaints and compliments to TheDepartmentOfComplaints@gmail.com
Keep in mind it is important to me that these entries be more of a stream of consciousness and not and editorial, as such no edits or corrections are ever made.
Thank you so much for reading and I hope you have a wonderful day-
Love,
Noah

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